With profound sadness and sorrow, we announce the passing of the wonderful Dorothy “Darlene” Martin (née McMichael) on January 25th, 2024 at the age of 84 with her loving family by her side.
Darlene was survived by her loving and devoted Husband, Harland McKay, her Daughter whom was her pride and joy Kelly McFarlane (Mike), her Step-Son Corey McKay (Michelle), her Sister Wendy Marsden (Rick Wyville), and Brothers-in-law Richard Martin (Fran), Walter Martin (Yvonne) and Gary Bennett (Rick). She leaves behind her cherished Grandchildren Brandon and Sarah McFarlane, Jessica and Kevin (“my boy”) Conroy, Blair McFarlane and Liam McKay. As well, the recent light of her life, Great Grandson Baby McFarlane “the little guy” (on the way). Doggie Grandma to her “puppy dogs” Scotia, Chloe, Spike and Scout, who she spoiled with treats that were always stocked in her cupboard. Darlene was a proud Aunt, Cousin, friend to many. Darlene was predeceased by her Parents Dorothy and Harvey McMichael, Brothers Doug and Wayne McMichael, Husband Daniel “Danny” Martin, Brothers-in-law Eric Martin (Anita), Allen Martin (Teresa), Grant Marsden, and precious Granddaughter Stacey McFarlane.
There are no words that will truly define Darlene. She was extremely strong-willed, fierce, kind, loving, caring and a true fighter. She fought through all the trials of her life when it came to loss, and her health, with nothing but grace. The will she had to live was admirable. No matter the pain she was feeling, or how hard her days were, she always made sure to check how everyone else was doing. Darlene offered help every time you spoke to her, in person or on the phone. Darlene never wanted you to go hungry, or without a “drink”. Darlene was always good for a hug and a kiss. She lit up the room with her bright eyes and beautiful smile, she was always dressed to impress. Darlene/Mom/Gram was great for conversation, she loved meeting people, she wanted to know everything about everyone – she made friends wherever she went.
Darlene loved her family to no end, especially her Grandchildren. She would do anything she could to support them. From vacations to hockey and lacrosse tournaments, to the cottage in Tobermory, camping, trips to Florida, hospital visits and stays with Stacey, trips to Toronto and Pickering, or just a ride around town, she was good for it. Darlene/Mom/Grandma and Harland loved to host family dinners and birthday celebrations. Sometimes we think they wanted us there to see how many people we could fit in the kitchen (if you know, you know). If you were ever lucky enough to receive a birthday card from Darlene, you know she was notorious for displaying your age in stickers on the envelope. We had so much fun counting those darn stickers to make sure she had them all on there. As we got older, the game got harder as the envelopes were covered in stickers. We are okay to say it now, but sometimes our age wasn’t properly represented in the sticker count. When we would tell Darlene, she would say “give me that back” and make whatever changes she needed to, in order for the envelope to be correct, she was a perfectionist.
Darlene looked forward to the phone calls from “the kids”, the visits, and celebrating all their accomplishments. She always wanted to know what we were doing – the updates from “the kids” were so important to her, she would write down every conversation and life event in her notebook. “Gram” loved to talk about her Grandchildren, so if you met her and chatted with her, we are sure you know all about Brandon, Sarah, Jessica, Kevin, Stacey, Blair, Liam, and Great Grandson “the little guy” on the way.
When Darlene wasn’t with her family, she was with her love, Harland. They spent everyday together, until recent months. Darlene and Harland loved to travel, specifically Aruba. When they weren’t in tropical destinations or with family, you could find them under the bridge for fries, or just a drive in the Mustang. They also enjoyed spending time at the casino with their friends. Harland never left her side during her time in Palliative. He lovingly held her hand as she passed on to the greater life. Darlene’s most proud accomplishment was Kelly. You could see love in her sparkling eyes for Kelly when she entered a room. Kelly truly was the light of her life. Kelly cared for Darlene in the later years, as Darlene cared for her as a child and adult. Darlene was always in awe of Kelly and her strength, but it really is a true reflection of Darlene as a mother; selflessly caring and committed to honest love. Their relationship was one of a kind, and their love is forever.
Gardening was another passion of Darlene’s. Her yard was picture perfect all the time with the generous (volun-told) help of Harland. She would spend hours outside making sure all the flowers had what they needed. She also didn’t mind the time to work on her tan, which was always something to be jealous of. Maybe now Darlene can help Sarah and Jessica with the care of Orchids.
We would like to express extreme gratitude to Darlene’s special Neice Cindy for all her care and compassion, as Darlene knew she could count on her with a single call. As well, to “Chopper”, for being around when we weren’t, supporting and checking in on Darlene/Mom/Grandma, and just popping in to say “Hi”. To the Personal Support Workers who assisted Darlene daily, she appreciated the support, visits and new friendships. An extremely heartfelt and special thanks to Dr. MacSweeney, Dr. Crombeen and the whole Palliative Care team at Bluewater Health. You all made the last moments of Darlene’s life so peaceful and respected, and supported Harland and our family, above and beyond. Thank you. The warm and delicate placement of her Dove will remain with us forever.
Our lives will be forever changed without you Darlene/Mom/Gram. You have shown us all what true love and dedication is. You have provided us with lifelong memories that we will all hold dear in our hearts. You have had such an impact on those who knew you, you will not be forgotten, but you will surely be missed. As Darlene/Mom/Gram would always say “don’t forget how much I love you”. We will never forget.
Cremation has taken place, as per Darlene’s wishes. A private memorial will be held at a later date.
Those wishing to make a donation in memory of Dorothy “Darlene” are asked to consider Bluewater Palliative Care, Cystic Fibrosis Canada and Canadian Cancer Society. Online condolences may be expressed by visiting www.gilpinfuneralchapel.com
“She is Gone
You can shed tears that she is gone;
Or you can smile because she has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that she will come back;
Or you can open your eyes and see all that she has left.
Your heart can be empty because you can't see her;
Or you can be full of the love that you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday;
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember her and only that she is gone;
Or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back.
Or you can do what she would want:
smile, open your eyes, love and go on.”